I tell strange lies sometimes. I’m not a pathological liar or anything serious like that. It isn’t consistent enough to be diagnosed.

I started telling little lies to people I met online, people I wouldn’t have to socialize with other friends. I told one friend that I was allergic to bees when I wasn’t. I told someone my parents were divorced when they were not.

Most of the time I would lie because someone assumed something untrue. Once I said I was half Japanese when someone said that my pictures looked Asian. Once I said I was adopted when someone assumed I was. I wanted to be easier to understand, so I confirmed the things they thought they knew about me.

Sometimes I got lonely and drunk and the lies got weird. Like, once I told someone that I used to carry a gun in my purse. She asked what kind of gun it was. I didn’t know. I had to tell her then that I was lying.